Thursday, December 29, 2005

CASE #30: BRITNEY + KEVIN



SUBMITTED BY:BRITNEY
LENGTH OF RELATIONSHIP: 5 days total, over the course of a month.
INFO: Her: major party-er. Him: bar owner. Met at said bar and went home together that night.
**(This is all done through text messaging. That's why it's special.)**


----------------------------------------------------

DATE: December 15th, 2005

FROM:Britney
TIME:12:38am

D**** (after hours club) open tonight? i am a retarD-i miss you

FROM:Kevin
TIME:1:56am

Common then

FROM:Kevin
TIME:2:15am

Im steemin - but imbreathin in then out ya jnow. Everyones drunk n havin a good time. IM workin n depressed .N.O.W.....L.A.T.E

FROM:Kevin
TIME:2:26am

Uh....Me heart hurts.

FROM:Britney
TIME:2:30am

Hey, tonight has been a mess. as much as i dont want too,i am retarted for you! deal with that as you may.

FROM:Britney
TIME:2:38am

i dont have a car. please reply. i am not a girly girl, so need some info.

FROM:Kevin
TIME:2:38am

Uh-its caught up to me again.........Erasin time,ya kmow. I liked ya once bABe.....Happy holidays.....
Signed--.L.O.N.E.

FROM:Kevin
TIME:2:46am

Uh......... Just sucks behn me a lot.....UUUUH!

FROM:Britney
TIME:2:51am

Yup, we all want what we can not have. i have the luxury of being mush because i am supposed to (move) next month. but oddly enough, i still reallylike you

FROM:Kevin
TIME:2:52am

Ya forgot to read my manual....... It read....... A.T.
T.I.M.E.S......
.F.R.A.G.I.L.E.

FROM:Britney
TIME:2:57am

Hey, i am just a girl looking foR my own peace of mind. you need to decide if you are interested.

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:02am

look- i have been drinking tonight. if everything is going to in bad, so be it. but i would like to return your things & say goodbye

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:04am

i dont want it to be over. sure, i am retarted but i am crazy about you!

FROM:Kevin
TIME:3:04am

Man - its totally not like that. NO one will ever know my story n ya dont owe my nothin baby doll. Im guess ill just enjoy my tail spin cause its always a

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:06am

fine. bye.

FROM:Kevin
TIME:3:06am

W.O.E! I cant handle this. All i needed was good sound company........I think....H.U.U????

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:10am

You have to kep in mind i have no attention span & am shit faced

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:15am

H.u.u? i dont know what that means. you know, there is a large back ground gap. this sucks, because this never would have happened if i had not met my ex tonigh.

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:19am

basicaly, you've had to take some one else's burden tonight. i know better than that. plus i know i am leaving next month

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:22am

enjoy your night. this chicky just had too much to drink.

FROM:Kevin
TIME:3:29am

Some things are worth it. Some things...... Just arent. Im in a weird place of uncertainty?

FROM:Britney
TIME:3:33am

you don't have to tell me. i am out of here next month

FROM:Kevin
TIME:4:19am

Wish ya woulda been here..........I call my mother n my sis is du mon. One day ya ll have to see your text. I never liked mean people? Sorry n thank u.


8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What? These two people could both get a logical conversation out long enough to hook up?

4:46 PM, December 29, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

no shit. seriously...does this even qualify as a dialogue? my first guess would be that they are drunken 12 yr. olds, but he owns a bar, so i guess not. come on, e-closure...be a little bit more selective.

11:06 PM, December 29, 2005  
Blogger e-closure.com said...

it's a TEXT MESSAGE breakup. It's so juvenile it's funny. or maybe that's just me. is it just me? oh god. it is isnt it?

-Dwayne

1:30 AM, December 30, 2005  
Anonymous tony said...

I enjoyed it. I have to admit that I think breaking up by e-mail or letter is funny enough... let alone a text?!? I mean, a letter is okay if you can't say all the shit that needs to be said, but at least give it to the other person in person.

Text messaging is just a whole new realm of silliness. People like this should not legally be allowed to have sexual intercourse. It is a prime example of why thirteen year old girls can be seen pushing strollers around.

8:43 AM, December 30, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are they even taking to each other?
I hope they are both drunk, otherwise one might think they were retarded.

3:14 PM, January 03, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They are both drunk, aaaaand retarded, aaaaand text messaging... so what can you expect?

I thought it was pretty funny, though. Desperate and funny.

5:47 PM, January 05, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seriously? Reading this gave me a headache. I'm still not sure if it even made sense.

From now on can we stick to letters? Although the frown on my face while reading this garbled message probably made it look like I was concentrating one something at work.

9:49 AM, January 10, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...i dont have a car. please reply. i am not a girly girl, so need some info...
I just wish someone would write that to me, just once.

1:09 AM, March 17, 2006  

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