Tuesday, July 24, 2007

CASE # 75: R + DJ


INFO: The story; I've recently met a guy I've fallen head over heels for. He broke my heart. I was staying with a friend for a few weeks while was teaching at a summer camp over at the university. Her two apartment-mates and I became good friends. Two Korean guys, one of which had arrived in the US only two weeks earlier. Let's call him 'DJ'.

The three of us and two more of their friends would all hang out, cook food, chat and I would help them all with their homework. (I'm an education major in my last semester and I do a great deal of volunteer work with ESL students).
Despite barely being able to speak English, 'DJ' was exceedingly charming. We went out for coffee, talked a great deal and I helped him with some basic adjustment needs. Nothing more than I normally do for an international student. I helped him buy a car, transfer his international driver's license to a state one and get insurance.

The guys and I had already talked at length about their American hopes and aspirations. They asked me why American (i.e. white) girls didn't seem interested in dating them. I told them it was just stereotypes that they needed to overcome and that even I had dated a Korean. 'DJ' and I started spending time alone together, listening to music and talking about culture.

He confessed to me that a no one, much less a stranger, had ever been so nice to him and he valued me greatly as a friend. I asked him why he didn't just ask me out. He said he had thought about it, that I was 'his style'. So we agreed to give each other a try. After a few homemade Korean dinners, rounds of Starcraft, and late-night conversations, 'DJ' asked if I just wanted to stay the night in his room. No pressure for sex, he just wanted to be near me. He was perfect gentleman and nothing happened at the time. We picked out pet names for each other. Eventually, the deed was done, but he was the perfect gentleman about the whole thing too. Not nearly as clumsy as most college guys I'd dated (We share the same birthday, he's 24 and I'm 21.).

After my teaching job was over, I returned home for the summer. Daily phone calls and emails curbed the loneliness. Everyday, he wrote little messages, 'I love you', 'I want to see you' and 'I miss you'. Beautifully constructed pieces of Engrish.

After a month of this, I drove two hours to see him last week. The first night, sex again. More 'I love you' and 'I missed you so much'.

The next day he told me that he just wanted to be friends. That the culture is too different. I asked him to reconsider, I would try to learn his culture the best I could. After that he said that he 'needs more time to arrangement his mind.' He has asked me wait a week or two.

Well, fuck him. I got tired of waiting, so I wrote this gem to him and emailed it today.

I wrote it in a way to accommodate his beginning English reading ability. I wanted him to understand every single word. Every bit of my wrath and pain is in this letter in the most simplistic way possible.


You needed some time to think?
Well, I've done some thinking.

I don't want a relationship with you.
I don't want to be your friend.

I really hate you.

You are nothing but a bastard.
You broke my heart. You tricked me. I feel so betrayed and hurt. I trusted in you. You are cold and heartless.

I'm too good and beautiful for a such pitiful boy like you. My kindness could have changed your life in the US for the better. But you chose to reject my love.

Why did I ever speak to you or beg you to love me? It was so stupid!

You are a cruel and miserable person.

Now, I've learned from my mistake called DJ. I will never make that mistake again!

I know now that you never loved me or cared about me. 'I miss you' and 'Sarang hae' was only a lie! All you wanted was sex and to destroy my spirit. Why did you break my heart? Your family, mother and sister should be ashamed of you. You should be ashamed of yourself. You have no soul or emotions.
Maybe someday you can grow up and become a man. You will never meet another American girl to show you kindness.

I also want to tell you that you have a very tiny penis. The smallest I've ever seen!! Microscopic! That's why I couldn't have the orgasm from you. You have horrible sex skills, like a blind man. I had to wash my body 10 times to clean the stink of you and kimchee sweat from me. Improve yourself 1000% before you try sex again with an American. The American girl will laugh at you!

Stupid child, never contact me again. Don't call me or message me ever again.

-a girl better than 'R'-


Blogger e-closure.com said...

dear readers,

we don't need you to be nice but we do appreciate it when your comments are constructive.


8:28 PM, July 24, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Weird. That situation seemed genuine, but the letter didn't. I mean... "kimchee sweat"? Really? Would anyone EVER say that?

10:44 PM, July 24, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. That was an awful letter. It doesn't sound like DJ was trying to hurt her intentialy. Perhaps he realized that dating a white girl might not be accepted in his family. I had a chinese friend who dated a white guy before, and she told me that If her dad ever found out, he'd cut off her tits and kill her. She was joking of course, but very serious about bringing home white dudes.
It sounds like R has been burned many, many times. This isn't even a big deal. Crazy bitch.

3:21 PM, July 25, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

maybe his penis wasn't small, but that her vagina was very big, no?

3:24 PM, July 25, 2007  
Blogger Reverend Steve said...

Did I miss something or did R go to Defcon 1 over what basically amounted to a "bump in the road?"

Also, what is this nonsense about her trying to learn his culture the best she could? (Was she trying to be his Geisha Girl or did she just suck at using chopsticks???)

R... either you have left out some very pertinent details or you are completely insane. Either that, or the pertinent detail is your insanity, and that is why he needed the time to think about all of this. (Is "crazy" a culture?)

PS. Charles + Dwayne... I don't think an e-closure this coarse would have made it to press back in the golden days of e-closure (the 30's and 40's). Reference our dialogue regarding the coarseness of one of my e-closures, pre-production. Still... I (heart) your site and (heart) your penises, neither of which are two small for me, individually or collectively.

8:11 PM, July 28, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps, initially, the language barrier concealed how immature, unintelligent and/or, plain insane, 'R' is. Despite the language barrier, to his horror, DJ probably realised 'R's' shortcomings and tried to make a hasty exit. 'R' needs to help.

10:24 AM, July 31, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. You know you're the better person when you resort to insulting your partner's genitalia in a desperate attempt to make yourself look less pathetic. Poor DJ. :/

5:51 PM, August 02, 2007  
Blogger e-closure.com said...

Hey Rev,

I hear what you're saying but I can't fully agree.

The reason this coarseness was posted was due to the story of the submitter. If she was just Joe Schmo Racist, we would've turned it away. But the girl who wrote this letter is an EDUCATION MAJOR/ESL TEACHER.

And to see someone who is so educated and makes money teaching people of other cultures English lose herself, scrape the bottom and maybe even get a little racist over someone she has a huge language barrier with and who just came to the country two weeks ago... well to me that just has too much true color honesty to not be posted.

And I hope that when R looks back on this one day she'll realize she'll have grown and she won't destroy the next guys image of his genitalia for the rest of his life.

Or she'll start a ESL course of her own called: "I Love You. How much these 3 very important words mean to American girls (and some guys) and when you should/shouldn't use them."

Love Always,

12:00 PM, August 04, 2007  
Anonymous Kelsey said...

I really don't believe the punishment fit the crime here...the situation just sounded like he needed some time, and she didn't even allow that time to pass before shooting him that email... I really hope that wasn't sent...eek.

11:03 AM, August 29, 2007  

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