Wednesday, October 07, 2009

CASE # 104: Masochistic Femme Fatale + Brooklyn Boy

SUBMITTED BY: Masochistic Femme Fatale

Born&Bred Bklyn Boy(Bbbb)/Masochistic Femme Fatale(mff)
1 yr of horrible & turbulent hell speckled with only a masochist’s appreciation and sometimes awkward and disturbing joy

Dear Bbbb,

Our relationship was not a box of chocolates but more a box from Pandora herself. Mysteries, secrets, puzzlement, and brainteasers leaving one with the $4,000 question, "who the f^$% are you dude!", only magicians could pull out of a hat what you could pull out of a minute! The saddest part is you were the most manipulating disaster worker out there yet I know you can't even read this without help with your eight grade knowledge. How could an intelligent creature such as myself I could fallen for a guy with only a middle school education at most. But it ended up being your swagger, your cute Brooklyn accent, and all the presents you showered upon me night and day that titillated that oh so wonderful G spot that hijacked my brain to make stupid and oh so lustful decisions. I didn't even like you at first. In fact you reeked of trickster the first minute you opened your mouth and the words "howwww youuuu dooooin" fell out. In fact my solar plexis did a back flip from Borough Hall to Wall Street faster then the express train. You were synonymous with the word WRONG WAY, but it only took a bad dating experience that got me to take that left inside of the right! You knew it too and even though you didn't know much about integrity you made up for it in perseverance. I guess predators have to. So you finally got me and made me your neighborhood girl and everyone would know including your wife, yeah the one you were "separated" from. But it turns out you found the only submissive Latin woman in the borough that overlooked your scandalous ways and hence I believed your story. I even stood by you when Ms. Thang from Queens showed up wanting the last thing I could even imagine hearing over the phone from the other other woman... a requested DNA test...which came out positive. As I write this letter now, I feel like I am writing a script for the Jerry Springer show, but no it just happened to be a reality you brought to my life. You turned me into everything ugly and horrible that I never knew I could own. You turned my life, my apartment, my checking account upside down. And when you finally tried to get the best of me, all of my instinct to fight back saved my life. Now I am stronger, wiser, bolder, and more articulate as to whom I am, what I want to write and create in my life script. I used to have a writer's block, but now you opened up the flood guts baby! As you get the final look of me on that back of a book you will try to convince whoever you are now manipulating with the words "I used to date that girl" and I will never ever think about you again, unless I decide to consult on an article regarding sociopaths. Too bad the courts let you keep walking the streets for stalking and assaulting me. I know one day they will get you for something much more serious. You are never going to change. I pray for the safety of all women that they don't cross your path. AMEN! I never thought I could become so delusional because of a man but it wasn't until I realized I was dating a demon that I forgave myself.

-Have fun in your future home,
Rikers Island, Bbbb


Anonymous dick cheney's shotgun of advice said...

Universal Question:

How could an intelligent creature such as myself I could fallen for a guy with only a middle school education at most?

Universal Answer:

But it ended up being your swagger, your cute Brooklyn accent, and all the presents you showered upon me night and day that titillated that oh so wonderful G spot that hijacked my brain to make stupid and oh so lustful decisions.

The big question is: why do we even waste our time with self-discovery and self-improvement?

11:39 PM, December 03, 2009  
Anonymous jenny lewis said...

Anytime a relationship breaks up it always breaks my heart :( But I believe it is possible to get back together with your ex if you really want it :)

3:26 AM, February 12, 2010  
Anonymous Charaze said...

Ah! I agree! I think love would have to be a box of chocolates. It has a lot of flavors but it's still sweet to the taste. And, yes, life is like a Pandora's box. A lot deeper than just a box of chocolate.

2:15 AM, October 05, 2010  
Anonymous lenzy said...

Sounds romantic...

2:17 AM, October 12, 2010  
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