Sunday, September 16, 2007


INFO: After quitting a shitty job and moving back to my homestate, I posted a Craigslist ad looking for dudes to hang out with. The ad very specifically listed my affinity for drinking and smoking a lot of weed, as well as for watching really hardcore horror movies. I made it clear that any guy hanging out with me should probably be into those things too. Call me a pothead but at least I'm upfront about what I'm looking for!

Brad responded to my ad and sounded like an OK guy, if maybe a bit tame. He was into anime, video games, and studying Japanese in his free time... Probably should have set off my lame-o-meter but we went on a date to see the movie "Zodiac". We chatted a bit over Starbucks and then went to the movie, which was really good but definitely not what one would call 'gory'... After the movie Brad won't shut up about how gross and gratuitous the one scene where someone gets shot is, which if you've seen the movie, you know it is totally not. Anyway... while we had been chatting it became clear that Brad didn't like drinking and was morally against marijuana. I'll reiterate that HE responded to my ad specifically seeking a scruffy stoner type of guy. To top it off he actually told me he didn't really like scary movies and preferred romantic comedies!! What kind of guy says that??

So he asked me to come hang out at his house afterwards (which was available because his "roommate", a.k.a. his father, was out that night) and I politely declined, leaving it open that we could potentially hang out again but making no mistake that I was not too interested. Over the next few days he kept IMing me in the way people sometimes do where they are like "hi", "what's up?" without ever actually making conversation. Very annoying. So finally a few days later we had the following conversation over AOL Instant Messenger and thankfully I haven't heard from him again! Haha. Enjoy!

Brad: hi
Angelina: hey
Brad: what are you up to?
Angelina: just hanging out
Brad: ah, yeah. me too
Angelina: good stuff
Brad: you want to hang out some on tuesday?
Angelina: i dont know, i have to see what's going on this week
Brad: ok
Brad: well my schedule is pretty open on tueday
Angelina: cool
Brad: I was thinking maybe we could hang out here and watch a movie and play games
Brad: unless you wanted to do something else
Brad: is that cool? or do you have any other ideas?
Angelina: you know i've been thinking about it... im not really sure we make a good match. you seem really cool and very nice and cute but i just dont feel like we share enough interests
Angelina: i hope that isnt really lame, im sorry. i just want to be honest
Brad: actually, yeah. That is really lame. We've met once, and all of a sudden we don't have anything in common?
Angelina: well, sorry if you think its lame. i posted an ad looking for a partying kind of guy who likes scary movies and you dont like either of those things, hate me if you want but im just looking for a guy i'll enjoy hanging out with
Brad: you're perhaps one of the most shallow people I've met.
Angelina: well, sorry.
Brad: well, good luck smoking yourself stupid.
Angelina: haha ok, good luck with life. i can respect the choices of others even if i dont necessarily want to hang out with them, so have fun being judgemental. works really well around children. [he was studying to be an elementary teacher]
Angelina: and you obviously havent met very many shallow people because not wanting to mold yourself to someone else doesnt make you shallow
Brad: uh huh
Brad: right
Angelina: going out once is not a guarantee of wanting to do it again
Angelina: so, sorry if it wasnt what you expected
Angelina: and, your judgmentalness about smoking is making me really happy that i told you flat out i didnt want to hang out again. i dont think you would like me much if you got to know me, especially since all i did was say we had differing interests and you called me shallow and insulted me
Angelina: so..
Brad: oh? You're still talking?
Angelina: hahaha ok, buh bye


Blogger Reverend Steve said...

Hmmm... he responded to your ad, you claimed to smoke alot of dope and like horror movies and he liked romantic comedies?

Maybe he was hoping you were a dude. Do you look like a dude? Maybe he was hoping that if he hung out with you long enough, you would say something like, "I have something to tell you, Brad... I'm a dude" and maybe then pull out your wang and show it to him.

Far fetched? Hardly...

(I will have to write an e-closure about how I accidentally went on a date with a gay dude once. From my understanding, this happens all the time to straight guys in Ann Arbor, Michigan.)

Reverend Steve
(not gay)

5:37 PM, September 22, 2007  

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